Diablo 2 is the granddaddy of Action RPGs with an addictive gameplay loop that will surely scratch the itch of looting and grinding, all while encompassing the scope of character building. The thing is this specific kind of itching never stops, and instead of soothing the sensation, you are plagued with a ‘just one more run’ blister that refuses to heal. After countless Nightmare Countess runs you find that the runeword you’ve been grinding for is finally complete and you can move on to Baal runs or PVPing. It’s at this moment you realize there is a stench starting to build up and you come to realize it’s you, and no one wants to be around you.
This is okay, however, because it means fewer real-world distractions and more time to spend in Diablo 2: Resurrected. This is until your Ghom-like stench forces your neighbors to call the police because there could be a dead body next door. Little do they realize that what that smell really is is the testament of all the death you’ve wrought by slaying countless hordes of demons and undead, all in an effort to squeeze out more juicy drops. This is a typical experience for many Diablo 2 players and one I know I am looking forward to having for myself upon Diablo 2: Resurrected’s release. The biggest concern is going into Diablo 2: Resurrected without a plan so as to not suffer any real-world consequences, and that’s what this article is all about.
Before Diablo 2: Resurrected
The worst experience is forgetting to feed you or your dog because of the need to do more Hell Pit Runs but never fear, this article will guide you on the necessary precautions that are important to consider before losing yourself or your dog in Diablo 2: Resurrected. Thankfully, the remaster is releasing on a Thursday and there won’t be any ladder upon launch, meaning there is no competitive rush to play the second it comes out. This might sound like blasphemy to many, but the extra time before the likely days off during the weekend means extra time to prepare so that there are fewer breaks during the game session.
The first thing to do before starting your new addiction is to figure out how much time you have to dedicate. Whether you have a few hours, a couple of days, or you’ve recently broken your ankle and have many weeks to dedicate to Diablo 2: Resurrected, you’ll still need to know how much time you’re working with. This is because of an annoying aspect about being alive and that is the need to eat. Unfortunately, there isn’t much you can do to get around this necessity unless you happen to be from Namek, so the best thing is to prepare the meals beforehand.
I recommend preparing a combination of a carb, a vegetable, and a protein, whatever your preference is, and store the ready-made meals in easy-to-microwave containers. My go-to meal is rice, asparagus or broccoli, and tilapia as they are really easy to make, especially if you have a rice cooker. I would make all of this a day or two before Diablo 2: Resurrected launches, and put together about 10-15 Tupperware meals for the oncoming commitment. That way after 8 or so hours of running through Diablo 2: Resurrected when the hunger pain kicks in, you can take 3 or 4 minutes to heat up a meal and you can take this time to use the washroom and feed your dog. Efficiency is key.
Any real-life obligations should also be considered before the game launches, otherwise, they may interfere with time spent in the game. It should go without saying that any vacation time should have been requested to line up with the time of Diablo 2: Resurrected’s release, but going further couldn’t hurt. If there are birthdays or other obligations, make sure to feign an oncoming sickness such as a cough or sore throat a few days prior. This will make selling the idea that you might be too sick to attend family gatherings and the like unsuspicious when the time comes. This is made easier thanks to the pandemic that is currently plaguing real-world Sanctuary right now.
During Diablo 2: Resurrected
When Diablo 2: Resurrected comes out you will have some things to consider when starting, most notably the class you decide to first play. Now, the correct class in a new ladder is the Sorceress but if you want to be less efficient, any other class will be fine. While feeding will happen intermittently, slaying hordes of demons will definitely cause a thirst, usually a thirst for more drops, but also water. Keep a large jug container filled with water nearby so it only needs to be refilled when you feed yourself. Although tempting, I recommend not drinking very much caffeine as it’ll make you use the washroom more than you’d probably like, resulting in fewer drops.
Another demon to avoid is social media. Though for a lot of people this is how we stay connected to each other, social media is also very good at stealing your attention away from more important tasks and so it’s for this reason that I suggest turning off notifications on the phone that you surely have. Remember, any time spent away from the game means less loot to sift through and less exp per hour. You want to minimize the amount of attention you are spending outside the game while keeping your eyes glued to your screen as long as possible. Your brain uses up a lot of energy, so funneling that energy into Diablo 2: Resurrected is the goal here.
Though your brain uses up the most energy, stamina pots don’t really exist in real life, so maintaining high comfort levels will also be important for a healthier long-term gaming session. Whether you will be gaming on a console or PC, you will want to make sure wherever you are sitting has proper back support. It helps when sitting with a good posture and even having a lumbar pillow (or any pillow really) in the right spot will go a long way. Ideally, it is also good to take a few minutes to stand and walk around every 30 minutes, but this could cut into farming time, so do this at your own discretion.
After Diablo 2: Resurrected
Let’s be honest, there won’t be an ‘after’ Diablo 2: Resurrected because once you take that first Diablo-infused dopamine hit, that’s it. You will become just like everyone else who has decided to make Diablo 2: Resurrected a larger part of their life, and to be honest it ain’t so bad. That’s why if you haven’t given Diablo 2 a try during the remaster’s beta recently or even the original yet, it is definitely a huge decision to consider and not something that can easily be undone. If you do decide to take the plunge, do not take these precautions lightly as they’re the first steps to becoming an efficient farming machine.
Eventually, as you play more and more Diablo 2: Resurrected, you will start to see the real world differently. You might begin to wonder why your pets don’t teleport to you when you go down a flight of stairs. The teddy bear your daughter asks you to buy her you might reconsider for another doll with better stats. You might realize that your current belt isn’t big enough to hold those 12 bottles of Gatorade. A rowdy pedestrian might just be begging to be PKed for their ear. Whatever you might experience post-Diablo 2, just remember to consider the practices listed in this article to help make your transition from regular joe to Guardian of Sanctuary all the more comfortable.
Here are some handy links that will make your journey through Sanctuary and the depths of Hell more digestible:
- Pure Diablo – A handy site with all information you could want, along with news updates and build guides.
- Runeword Calculator – A visually pleasing runeword calculator.
- Horadric Cube Recipes – A great list of everything you can make with the Horadric Cube
- Diablo 2 Database – Another information website currently in the works, though visually it looks very pleasing and will have a trade site up and running eventually.
- Gamer Stretches – Handy visuals on the importance of and how to stretch to prevent long-term injury.
- Beginners Guide to Meal Planning – For those who would like some more insight on just how to meal plan efficiently with some extra tips.